


poe dameron's quest for a true story

by bam_cassiopeia



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015), Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Gen, Points of View, Storytelling
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-13
Updated: 2016-02-13
Packaged: 2018-05-20 00:42:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,758
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5986534
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bam_cassiopeia/pseuds/bam_cassiopeia
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>five true stories about kylo ren and a true story about ben solo poe hears</p><p>or, a story about stories</p>
            </blockquote>





	poe dameron's quest for a true story

0

As a child, Poe Dameron loved stories with wholesome endings: evil defeated, heroes triumphant.

 

1

There’s a story that’s only ever told in hushed whispers in the less frequented corridors of Resistance bases.

The story goes like this: once, Leia Organa had a child, and that child was named Ben Solo. Ben, in honour of a dead jedi, Solo, because it was his father’s name. The child was quite ordinary, at first. Just a bit peculiar. But the older the child grew, the stranger he grew as well. And because he was so strange, the child was sent to his uncle, Luke Skywalker. Skywalker was the last jedi and wisest of men, and if anyone could have helped the strange child, it would have been him. But even a wise man could not help the strange child, and soon, it became obvious why. No one could help the child. The child was just the mask of a monster, and when the monster dropped the mask to don another, it became visible to all.

 

Poe hears the story soon after joining the Resistance, just after that disaster with the Yissira Zyde. It’s just a story. A pretty bleak one, to be pushed out of mind. He doesn’t like to gossip about General Organa. There are more important and pressing things to think about.

 

0

As a child, Poe Dameron loved stories ending with a bright future ahead for the heroes.

 

2

After Jakku, after the Finalizer and his escape and everything going to shit, Poe sits down with General Organa, and she tells him a story. There’s a monster in her story, but it’s not a child, it’s something much more insidious, a hidden shadow whose influence spans worlds. In her story, there’s a child, a victim from its first breath, stolen in its cradle and groomed by dark forces.

He listens and doesn’t ask any questions. Not if the child did become a monster. Not if her story means there never really was a child. Not if there really was nothing to be done after the shadows sunk their claws unto the child. Not – he doesn’t ask.

The questions are still there, though, and its seems everything brings more of them. When another child is sent to Luke Skywalker by his General. When she comes back, stronger and determined, but brittle, accompanied by an old man with a weathered face. When two children meet on the battlefield like it’s a game. When both sides stop trying to make any real use of them because their personal vendetta makes them too unpredictable, and still they always walk away unscathed from the field.

 

Finn wakes up. Priorities are priorities, and he would have put his interrogations on the side. But Finn is revealed to be force sensitive, and he wonders anew.

 

0

As a teenager, Poe Dameron learned wholesome endings were found only in the simplified worlds of stories.

 

3

“Oh, I could tell you, but I doubt you will like what I would say. Aren’t you more interested by First Order plans? I could, technically, give you those as well, being a General. But no – you’re more interested in a measly story…”

“For now, yeah, I am. What do you have to lose?”

“Maybe the man you’re asking me about doesn’t trust easily.”

“So it’s a guy under the bucket? I wasn’t sure with the dress and all…”

“…Is this torture by witticism? I have to warn you, I doubt it will work.”

“Who’s being witty now! See, we’re talking, you and I. Making jokes. It’s almost, you could say we’re being friendly here. You could throw me a bone. Maybe if it’s a good enough bone I’ll let you go, huh. What do you think of that?”

“I’m thinking you’ve gone through a lot of troubles for a story. You must really like stories.”

“I’m just curious. Sounds like a good story.”

“And I’m an idiot. I can’t even tell you that story – I doubt even the Supreme Leader could tell it entirely. No one knows, apart from Ren. Maybe. Some days. Probably rather few of those.”

“Really.”

“Really. You should not underestimate the extent of his lunacy. It will cost you heavily.”

“So you can’t tell me anything. At all.”

“I could give you some torture tips.”

“I would only use them to get that story out of you, so maybe you should save us the time?”

 

“He’s not actually part of the First Order – he is only the Supreme Leader’s pet apprentice. The Supreme Leader’s very insane pet apprentice. He probably scares our side more than yours, you know. He was still a child, the first time I met him. Saw him. He already had the helmet. He laughed hysterically all the time it took him to rip an officer to pieces. Barehanded. It took a very long time, if you must know. Longest execution I ever saw. It made an impression on the Order, but I wouldn’t say it was a good one.”

 

0

As a teenager, Poe Dameron learned sometimes stories end with heroes wondering if all they did was for nothing.

 

4

He thinks Rey knows something, but she’s not telling. He doesn’t really want to ask her personal details about her nemesis. He’s pretty sure it’s bad form to the jedi, and he should leave this can of worms alone. Her thing with Ren worries him, but he doesn’t want to push her, not now, when she’s so wound up and prickly. He takes a page out of his father’s book, and just ask her assistance when he does maintenance work on Black One. He hopes she enjoys the companionable silence they share in those moments as much as him.

 

He asks Finn, for the hell of it.

“What, you think a lowly Stormtrooper would know anything about Kylo Ren other than to stay the hell away?”, and that’s pretty much all Finn has to say on the subject, other than the addendum that Kylo Ren, in his opinion, is batshit insane. And pretty fucking scary.

He can’t exactly disagree.

Still, there’s something that nags at him. Some detail he’s missing.

 

0

As a child, Poe Dameron learned stories, like real life, are not always clear-cut.

 

5

The cell is pretty big, and there’s a window, but it’s still a cell. The prisoner is tall and gaunt, his face neatly bisected by a thick white scar. He’s wearing grey. Surprisingly, right now, he doesn’t look like much.

“Hello, Poe”, the man says.

“Hi there! How do you enjoy you cell?” he answers in return. The dig is unnecessary, the depth of his own resentment a surprise.

Kylo Ren keeps surprising him, because he just snorts, adding “Probably more than you enjoyed yours”.

He laughs. So there was a sense of humor under that bucket. It’s not a comforting thought.

“You killed Snoke”, he says.

“I did.”

“Why?”

“Ah. Why did I kill Snoke. You’re not exactly the first to ask, if you can imagine that.”

“Yeah, I –“

“That’s not the question you really want to ask, though.”

That’s a bit freaky.

“I’m not in your mind right now. I just… know you very well. In a way.”

Oh.

“Oh.”

Kylo Ren snorts. Again. Poe is out of his depth here, and part of him wants nothing but to bolt and go take a very, very thorough shower.

“Snoke’s death was a long time in the works”, Ren offers, when the silence starts to become really uncomfortable.

Poe had been there with Rey and Finn when they’d stormed Snoke’s hideout, and what was left of the body had clearly indicated the killer had to have been really pissed.

He’d burned a good pair of boots, that day.

“Why did you join the First Order? What happened?”

“Nothing happened. I made a choice.”

There has to be more to it than that.

“I’m still evil, Dameron. Stop overthinking things.”

 

It takes a bit of wrangling, but everyone knows Ren could break out of his cell if he wanted, and it’s not very hard to get the authorization to bring the man on walks outside his cell. No one really knows what to do with him, and the current priority is Emperor Hux’s renewed attacks on Resistance outposts and Republic planets alike.

Finding topics of discussion for those walks is easier than he thought. Machines are a safe subject. Ren trying to hide his enthusiasm behind his shitty attitude starts being funny. Much too soon, he’s thinking of the guy as an asshole instead of – something else. Something worse.

 

It’s Finn who suggests to join those walks, dragging Rey behind him. If he didn’t already have better reasons to do so, it’d be enough for Poe to kiss him. To everyone’s surprise, it’s not a disaster, not even when the walks become lightsaber practice sessions he arbitrates.

It’s painful, still. He’s not sure it’s worth it.

He’s almost sure it’s worth trying.

 

0

As an adult, Poe Dameron learns stories are about point of views.

 

+1

“Luke asked him to do it”, Rey tells him out of the blue, voice strangled, during one their quiet times, working on Black One. He takes the hydrospanner she’s handing him.

“Luke what now?”

She’s crying. Big fat tears, now sniffles, and then she’s really all out bawling. All he can do is take her in his arms while she curls into herself, and ignore the uncomfortable growing wet spot. No shushing her, and what could she have to tell him that’d put her in such a state…

“Luke sent Ben to Snoke – to find his location, he wanted to go and confront him – and –“

Sobs again. It takes a conscious effort to start stroking her back again, and he’s not okay right now.

 

Rey tells him, haltingly, a story about a strange boy who heard dark voices, a desperate uncle and an evil rising in the shadows. The story is much less clear-cut and simple than the first one he heard and just as bleak. He can get behind such a story. There’s still a monster, but monsters don’t have origin stories, they just are, so it’s not really a monster. The wise uncle doesn’t seem so wise anymore. There’s still a true evil, but the story is longer and the end – well, he knows endings are what you make of them.

 

0

As an adult, Poe Dameron dug around and found the hidden root of a story, and from this root he helped something new grow.

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> a mess all about grey areas, poe dameron dealing with stuff while being a goddamned cinnamon roll, and pseudo philosophical depths.
> 
> my tumblr askbox is always open if you want to be sure i'll react to your comments/questions/something.


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